Tuesday, May 26, 2009

hey dad

does anyone else here hate the classification of "life partners"?

what is up with pcp? i'm going to research it for fun.

another thing i researched recently was "the vapors". not the band, the fake ailment from the days of old. it is hilarious. it was the reason vibrators were invented. isn't that a weird fact?

Sunday, May 17, 2009

i got bees

i went to very north portland yesterday and learned a lot about bees. one of my client's foster dad is a beekeeper, or beesmith. he told me all about his italian bees and what their deal is. he keeps his bees at this commune like place where the shower and toilet just chill in the wide open. if you drive by, you could see naked people who i'm sure are extremely hairy! that's out of line, i just grossed myself out.

the beesman explained to me that male bees basically don't do anything. they are called drones and don't even have butt knives. only the females (or workers) can sting you with their sharp butts. a female one put her sharp butt in my neck while i was just standing still.

while the females and queens are pretty bad a, i think that the males are my favorite because it is their job to get excited. sometimes drones have to find a new place to live. they fly around and search for a new house. when they find one, they return to the group to dance about it. they pretty much have to explain their new possible house through the hilarious art form of bee dancing. whoever dances and gets excited the best, has their place chosen. humans should do this. we could learn a lot from bees. don't get me started on bee dongs though. ouch. oh here is this kid: